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invitanAnyway, I don't know if I should feel good. Or not. The last 3-day holidays of CA2, and I don't even have a chance to enjoy myself at all.
Tests and exams and tests 8-} It feels like almost as stressful as this time last year, though as my seniors have assured, just enjoy yourself and your sec 3, no need to push it too hard this year. But, just have a look, how am I supposed to relax, when Geog test and SS test and Physics test and especially Lit and Eng test are coming up one by one? Damn it. It's totally a mess.
I just want a little break from this crazy school life. That's all I ask for, damn it.
But my mood gets a little better when my lit holiday exercise is returned. *beaming* got full mark for the first time (counting the numerous times I have gotten so close and yet missed = =). Still it would mean nothing if I screw up in my test in the next 2 weeks, the possibility of which is - I swear - above 70%. I really need a break. I always do better without stress, I mean.
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One more thing, I just read the most lovely Singaporean I ever known's blog a few days ago, and she called me the awesomest deskmate ever XDD (though just for one post, and she just meant so say thanks when she was sick and I called her to inform the schoolwork). I just realize that I start to think about her more than normal, as if I love her or something :)) But well, I guess, I always have some kind of obsession towards my current closest friend, which often scares myself. But never mind, as long as I haven't dreamt about her, I'm still curable XD
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The Big Mouth cried. I mean he really really cried in front of girls, as so he said. Which I found kinda unbelievable, since... well... HE CRIED??? Not that I haven't seen him all emo and stuffs, but it's just not like him at all. Have always thought of him as a really loud-mouth shorty (sorry for making fun of your height, but I just cannot help it :D ), and somehow thoughtless and spontaneous (I mean, in a good way :P ). The only time I saw him practically look distressed is when he failed the scholarship. Well, I mean, it's just a normal thing right, anyone would have felt ultimately disappointed at himself in such situation. (at least I would have, or more precisely I actually did). To put it right, I never thought that someday he might cry (as he told me) because he doesn't have any close friend and 'cause he misses his secondary friends. Not that I blame him or anything, I might have cried too (if not want to say I actually did, 4 years ago = =). I'm purely astonished - never thought of him as some introvert, because he's totally NOT one. And I barely know what to tell him then, if I really should console him in some way.
I probably would come to see him when I return XD
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My dearest bro is coming back in June. Finally, 7 years of waiting XD XD
Now I really wish this flu would be over with all my heart.
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I don't know if I'm being myself right now, or imitating someone else? It's just strange. Am I growing up, or becoming more childish? Simply to put, I stop being angsty (or so I hope). Only frustrated at times, but no, no angst. While I have always been such a walking shadow back in VN.
It's a crazy thought, I know, but despite how much I miss VN, I cannot help thinking that I just could not express myself in a whole back then.
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I love Hikaru no Go for what it is. I totally do.
Someone does not. Or as so I feel.
Hikaru no Go is not angsty. It'll never will be. That's why I can accept if people try to explore that angsty side of it. But not excessive, just enough of an amount.
Hikaru no Go is a story of developing. It's not about mourning for the past - well, it does emphasize on the importance of the past, but it heads for the future. So I totally love the new covers of the republished version - it's a development isn't it, and it worths respect from other fans.
Or maybe I'm just to apply my domineering thoughts on others. Maybe. I don't really know.
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After all, life doesn't really suck.
Or not yet.